You know what it’s like. Of course you do. You wake up in the morning and stroll on over to the nearest palm tree. You casually lean on it and a coconut falls down from the tree top and hits you on the head. You naturally blush as the canned laughter roars out from the live studio audience.
But at least you have a coconut now. Breakfast is sorted. Or is it? How do you husk the coconut? And how do you open the coconut when it has already been husked? There are still questions to be answered.
You saunter back over to your makeshift tipi, constructed from sticks and leaves bound together by a handful of dead snakes and give the coconut a bit of a beating with a pointy stick. Nothing happens.
You throw the coconut at a tree. Nothing. You throw the coconut at a nearby wild boar – in case you haven’t realised yet, you’re stranded on a desert island. You have wild boars, trees, coconuts and canned laughter to spare as you go slowly delusional – but still nothing.
You even try and throw a wild boar at the coconut, but the wild boar is quite heavy and ends up just tusking you in the face until you drop it, allowing it to run away while looking back at you with a justified mixture of confusion and disgust.
To be fair to the boar, it was a ridiculous idea to start with. What were you thinking? What you should’ve done is got out that iPhone of yours and Googled “How to Husk a Coconut". You would’ve been greeted with one of the best videos on the internet.
And yes, for one reason or another, your desert island does happen to have internet access on it. To be honest, we don’t know why you’ve not used it to escape yet. Not so smart, are you?
Anyway, here’s the video. It shows Chief Kap Te’o-Tafiti husking a coconut with his TEETH, and opening the bad boy in a variety of ways.
Chief Kap Te’o-Tafiti is our favourite Samoan chief. We want to be friends with Chief Kap Te’o-Tafiti. But until that happens, we’ll settle for watching him maul apart coconuts with his canines and can-do attitude.