These Unlikely Rescue Tales Will Either Make You Smile, Vomit Or Find Jesus
Which body part would you cut off?
Mystery Jet Skier Rescues Child
A young girl was had to be rescued recently, when she fell asleep on her boogie board and drifted 4 miles out to sea.
Playing at the beach in Jersey with family members, 4 year old Jemima Chambers paddled out in the sea on her mini board, and was seemingly rocked to sleep by the waves.
The young girl’s mom thought Jemima was playing with her cousins, and that the dot on the landscape she could see was nothing more than a buoy. Realising it was in fact her stranded daughter out in the ocean, she screamed for help.
At this point, in a scene straight out of Bay Watch, a nearby jet skier gave the mother a lift out to where Jemima was enjoying the backwater, oblivious to the panic she’d created back on dry land.
The mom then rescued her daughter and, along with the mystery man, brought her back to the safety of the shore.
Nobody knows who this anonymous rescuer was, but the Chambers family are appealing to find his identity so that can thank this would-be Hasselhoff for heroics.
Hiker Rescues Himself (With A Blunt Penknife)
We’ve all see 127 Hours, right? The film where a hiker gets his arm trapped while down in a canyon, and he resorts to amputating it himself, rather be trapped with a flash flood getting ominously close to drowning him. If that sounds horrific, it’s got nothing on this next guy.
In 1993, William Jeracki went hiking and fishing in Denver, Colarado. Noticing stormy looking clouds drawing in, he decided to call it a day and head back to his truck. Unfortunately for him, William lost his footing and, in a bizarre turn of events, managed to upturn a large boulder which landed on his leg, crushing it.
Knowing a snow storm was fast approaching, William took the decision to free himself using what he had within reach. He used a length of fishing line as a tourniquet to prevent himself from bleeding out, before going to work on his leg with a blunt pocket knife.
He proceeded to work the dull blade through flesh, tendons, and ligament until his femur could be pulled out of his knee socket.
William then crawled on his freshly shorn stump to his truck, where he drove to the nearest medical centre, from where he was flown to the University Hospital of Colarado.
Whale Rescues Free Diver
In 2009 a pair of whales had to intervene when a diver found herself in trouble.
The Harbin Polar Land Aquarium in North Eastern China had a recruitment drive, looking for new trainers to work with their whales.
Not content with the old “I can work well on my own, or as part of a team" on a CV, the owners required candidates to free-dive as far down in a gigantic pool as possible, proving how comfortable they were in that environment.
One of seven prospective whale fanciers, Yang Yun, got down to a depth of 4 meters before she started to suffer with cramp in one of her legs. Struggling, she began swallowing water and sinking towards the bottom of the pool.
All was not lost for the plucky competitor though. Thankfully, a pair of beluga whales were also in the dive tank. Sensing the diver's distress, one of the whales, Mila, grabbed the young diver in her mouth and returned her to the surface.
At this point, other competitors joined the rescue, and helped stricken diver to the side of the pool.
Yang Yun was last spotted at a government funded Back To Work training scheme above a Sandwich Shop in Cannock.
Snowboarder Rescued By God (Kind Of…)
Earlier this year two brothers went snowboarding in Montana and received assistance from a higher power when things went wrong.
Teenagers Michael and Matt Walsh took their pick-up to Polecat Bench (which sounds more like something that gathers dust in your dad's shed than a choice snowboarding spot) in a bid to get some freshies.
When they reached the summit, they found Nirvana – pristine, untouched powder for as far as they eye could see. 17 year old Matt dropped in, while his older brother watched on from above. After a few seconds, a terrifying banging started as an avalanche was triggered.
Michael was thrown around in a large cloud of snow, but was largely unscathed. When he realised that had happened, he noticed he couldn’t see his brother anywhere.
Having left his mobile phone in the truck, and all out if ideas, he cried out aloud “what should I do?". This is where things get interesting. Recounting the tale to his dad later, Michael reportedly said “Dad, I’ve never heard God speak before, but I heard him there. He said, ‘Go find your brother.’ It was very clearly the voice of God." Clearly.
Fueled by divine inspiration, and definitely not just the natural instinct to rescue a stranded loved-one, Michael began frantically digging in the snow for his brother.
Scrambling around in the snow, Michael put his foot on the area his brother was buried. A small whole opened up in the snow and Matt was miraculously uncovered.
After 30 minutes of digging with his hands, Michael freed his brother from the concrete-like ice and snow. If nothing else, this goes to prove that God loves snowboarders.