Photo: Michael Henninger/Post-Gazette
Fans of regular sports - and by "regular sports" we're talking about football, rugby, cricket - the sports that the bores in the pub talk endlessly about to hide the fact that they resent where life has taken them - fans of regular sports can, from time to time find themselves in a spot of bother with the police.
Win or loose, it seems like some people can't help but find themselves poking the blue and white hornets nest. However, it's rare they do it with a skateboard.
But 20 year old Tristan Hardinger from Oakland, Pisttburgh did exactly that recently. While celebrating a win by the Pittsburgh Penguins ice hockey team which bagged his team the Stanley Cup, he seemingly decided that it was time to stick it to the man. Only, the man was a horse.
While hundreds of other fans celebrated in a peaceful way, Hardinger reportedly got his longboard (or, as the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette hilariously calls it, his "oversized skateboard") and started waving it at a line of police horses.
According to the report filed by Detective Edward Fallert of the Pittsburgh Police Department, Hardinger, “repeatedly pushed the skateboard toward the horses’ faces, acting as if he were going to strike them,". Not cool, bro. Not cool.
Hardinger was arrested on the spot and when taken to the local jail was, according to the police report “extremely intoxicated". Let's be honest, if you're doing that kind of shit sober, you wouldn't even need to plead insanity. Have you ever seen a horse up-close? They're massive!
Hardinger was arrested on the spot and when taken to the local jain was, according to the police report “extremely intoxicated". Let's be honest, if you're doing that kind of shit sober, you wouldn't even need to plead insanity. Have you ever seen a horse up-close? They're massive!
The silly Penguins fan is charged with taunting or harming police animals, which is not going to go down well should he wind up in prison and the massive guy sharing the cell asks "So, what are you in for?'.
But, before we in the UK get all "hard-e-har-har, look at the silly Americans!", it's worth remembering that this green, unpleasant land produced the man that tried to have a fist fight with a police horse just because the black and white team were playing the red and white team.
Whether it's with a skateboard or not, can we all just stop punching horses, please?