Marble Racing: Introducing One Of The Weirdest "Sports" In The History Of The Internet
You'd be marbles to miss out on this surprisingly entertaining spectacle.
Right, that's it. We've made the decision. No longer will we dedicate our lives to watching the England football team repeatedly try and fail to be good at football. Why? Because we're sick of it. We're sick of England promising so much, and delivering so little. We need a new sport. We need marble racing. Yes, you read that correctly. Marble racing. It's time to ditch "dem" soccerballs, and jump on board the internet's weirdest bandwagon. Trust us, folks. Trust us.
What is marble racing, then? Well, in a nutshell, it's marbles...racing. Look, we know that sounds rubbish. We know that sounds duller than dishwater. We know that marbles, on paper at least, are nothing to get the pulses racing. But, man, you need to see these marbles racing down this epic sand course in the Netherlands. You ain't ever seen anything like it.
The race featured in the video below is part two of a ten-race tournament to see which marble is the best. If our understanding of it is correct, the world of marble racing is a bit like Formula One in that points are awarded to competing marbles depending on where they finish in a race. The points accumulated during the races are then added together at the end of the "season," and the marble with the most points is crowned the winner.
The competing marbles have incredible names like 'Ghost Plasma', 'Marbly McMarbleface', and 'Wisp of Darkness' which only adds to the spectacle. Factor in the commentator's top level enthusiasm for marble racing, a number of dramatic obstacles such as "rock" (which is basically just a rock), and you've got yourself a recipe for some edge-of-your-seat entertainment.
Don't delay. Start watching marble racing today.