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Surfing

18 Things Surfers Hate About Surfing

It may be the best sport in the world, but that doesn't mean it can't be f*cking annoying...

1) Cold Wetsuits

A surfer with his surfboard at the beach

Look at the pain in this man’s face. He wants to start surfing, but he’s still getting over the pain of putting on his cold, wet wetsuit on a winter beach in North Wales. We feel you, man.

2) Incorrect Surf Reports

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The surf report says it’s going to be big. The surf report says it’s going to be clean. The surf report says it’s going to amazing. You get there, and it’s pancake city. The surf report lied.

3) Groms

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We get a mix of feelings when we see little kids ripping through the line up. One feeling is joy at such a wonderful example of the freedom and inclusivity of surfing. The other feelings are jealousy, anger and disappointment, we’ve been in the green waves longer than they’ve been alive. Sigh.

4) Eating Sh*t

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Yeah, yeh, we know. It happens to us all. But it doesn’t make it any less embarrassing or the feeling of being hit in the face with whitewater any less painful.

5) Surf Schools

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Most surfers were probably in one of these classes at some point but once they’ve graduated to the line up, it becomes clear how annoying surf schools are.

Got your perfect wave? Enjoy it while it lasts, you’re heading straight towards a stag party in matching purple rash vests still trying to get on their board…

6) Surfboard Costs

Surfboards background

Why does a decent surfboard have to cost so much?! You will look at your dream board for months on end, wondering how much you really need that savings account…

7) Bodyboarders

Woman in wetsuit with bodyboard surfing equipment having fun at the beach. Happy female surfer jumping for celebrating success and freedom.

Surfers like to think of themselves and pretty liberal, laid back folk. That’s until it come to bodyboarders. Don’t get them started on bodyboarders.

8) F*cking Up Your Duck Dive

Surfer girl comes up for a breath of air after finishing a duck dive with palm trees in the background

When you pull off a duck dive you look like a solid gold pro. When you f*ck it up you look like a clumsy seal, flailing in the water. Bad times.

9) Line Up Politics

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Or more specifically, people who don’t know them. Don’t drop in on people, don’t snake, keep hold of your board and know where to sit in the line up. Come on kooks!

10) Good Surf When You’re At Work

Fun Times With My Friends

All your mates are running into the perfect, perfect waves. Meanwhile, you’re discussing last night’s Gogglebox with Barbara from accounts.

11) Breaking Your Board

A young woman wearing a hooded coat is walking on a dramatic beach in the winter

The worst day in a surfer’s summer. It’s ok, you can grieve.

12) Breaking your Bones

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Annoying. Inevitable. Pretty damn painful.

13) Celebrities Pretending To Surf

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You’re not fooling anyone RiRi.

14) Celebrities That Can Surf Better Than You

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Damnit, Hemsworths… Is there anything you can’t do?

15) Good Waves On The Other Side Of The World

surfer on a backlit blue wave, getting barrelled at rocky point, on hawaii's north shore

The surf’s always good in Hawaii… Unfortunately, you live in Doncaster.

 

16) Sunburn

Sunburned sweaty man looks very unhappy in portrait

It doesn’t matter how much sunblock you put on, you always finish the day looking like a lobster (even when it’s cloudy).

18) Sharks

Great white shark, mouth stretched just before attacking

Just sharks. Always sharks.

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