The Cosmos

Why The F*ck Have Scientists Named A New Galaxy After Cristiano Ronaldo?

Astronomers peer back in time and discover one of the youngest and brightest galaxies ever seen

Photo: iStockPhoto

The party animals at the European Space Observatory have announced that, after looking through their very large telescope (that they, quite genuinely, named ‘Very Large Telescope’, the mad bastards) they’ve found a brand new galaxy.

More over, the new discovery is one of the youngest and brightest galaxies in all of the known universe.

A press release from the ESO says that they used the massive telescope to “peerback into the ancient Universe, to a period approximately 800 million years after the Big Bang…to produce the widest survey of very distant galaxies ever attempted.”

While doing so, the spotted this new, super bright galaxy. Much like when you stomp a new trick in action sport, when you find a new galaxy, you get the honour of naming it. Bafflingly, the nerds in white coats decided that the astral body would be named after over paid baby-man footballer Cristiano Ronaldo!

Photo: iStockPhoto

Astronomer David Sobral, who otherwise seems like a very intelligent man and an affiliate of the university of Lisbon, named the galaxy along with colleagues CR7, as a nod to the Portuguese footballer, who wears a number seven on his jumper when he plays, and bears the moniker CR7 on his boots.

We can’t help but feel that there are people rather more deserving of such an honour than a man who famously cries whenever his team is booted out of a tournament.

Photo: iStockPhoto


We’re not telling the space boffins how to do their job, but why not consider national hero, multi X-games winner, and Olympic bronze medalist Jenny Jones, or the greatest surfer ever to step foot on a board; Kelly Slater. Or why not give a nod to our old pall Danny MacAskill who, let’s face it, is only about a year away from backflipping over Saturn anyway.

Photo: iStockPhoto

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