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Met Office Warns Manchester And Scotland Could Be Hit By Up To 20cm Of Snow This Week

Is Manchester about to get the snow dump the Alps has been waiting for?

Photo: iStock
Photo: iStock

Oasis, fading footballing success, The Royle Family, The Happy Mondays, black pudding, Coronation Street, The Stone Roses, rain, constant fucking rain, Emmeline Pankhurst, British Cycling Success, The Hacienda, EDM (nee: dance music), A Clockwork Orange, a public transport that hasn’t had it’s workers go on strike within 10 days of a new year… there’s a lot that Manchester’s famous for.

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Noticeable by it’s absence on that list, is a thriving urban snowboarding scene. Despite the fact that the winter season in Manchester lasts from approximately October through to September, due to some geological abnormality where the Pennines keep the grey clouds locked above region, it’s always for too damp for any snow to stick on the ground.

Until now.

Today, The Met Office – the boffins who know about all things weather related in the UK – are warning that snowstorms and blizzards are set to hit Manchester later this week.

Little By Little, Noel Gallagher got the hang of snowboarding - Photo montage: Mpora

Some areas of the Greater Manchester area are expecting up to 20cm of snowfall on Wednesday and Thursday, which is approximately 20cm more than has fell in much of the Alps so far this year. What’s more, Scotland is also set to be hit by snow, later in the week as well, making Britain the nucleus of European skiing and snowboarding. Maybe.

Naturally, this being Britain, panic has already started. Mind have been lost at the ensuing traffic chaos, and the Manchester Evening news are warning about something called Thunder Snow, which sounds more like something you’d buy off a dodgy looking fella in Moss Side than you’d see occurring in the skies there.

But, of course, while road users are getting in a flap and panic, and car shops are putting the price of anti-freeze up by a million per cent, snowboarders and skiers in the areas affected, both in the North West and Scotland are already buzzing at the thought of finally hitting up those trannies and handrails they’ve eyed up for years.

Kind rail Afro - Bez hitting a four-kink somewhere in Manchester - Photo montage: Mpora
Kind rail Afro – Bez hitting a down flat down somewhere in Manchester – Photo montage: Mpora

Every year there seems to be a warning that one place or another is going to be besieged by freak snowfall, freezing pigeons to the street, and forcing all but the most skilful Uber drivers to stay at home, so we’re not holding our breath. But, if it does dump in Manchester this week, Mpora will be there.

Now, where did we put that winch?

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