7. Prancercise (1989)
IN WHAT WAY IS IT DERANGED?
Sporting glamorous jewellery and the Arabian Nights of all cameltoes, shrink-wrapped in white leggings, Florida-based unicorn/glam gran hybrid Joanna Rohrback brings us Prancercise: “A springy, rhythmic way of moving forward, similar to a horse’s gait and ideally induced by elation.” Or hallucination.
PEAK OF THE FREAKINESS
2:24, when Joanna “Really cuts the noose and lets it loose with the Prancercise gallop”, and then proceeds to act like the human embodiment of what happens in a cat’s throat when it coughs up a hairball.
TYPICAL YOUTUBE COMMENT
“Is that a gazelle? So much grace!”
IS IT A WORKOUT YOU’D ACTUALLY DO?
Nope. But props to Joanna, who gives the absolute square root of zero fucks, because prancing works for her. “I don’t worry what people might think,” she says. “Let them laugh. Who would pay attention to a boring, average, everyday video, anyway?” You go, lady. No-one puts Baby in the unicorner.