IN WHAT WAY IS IT DERANGED?
This breathing technique – taken from a fitness video ironically advertised as being “a sane way to a sensational body” – looks more like ‘exorcising’ than ‘exercising’. Southern belle Dixie Carter instructs us to stretch out our tongues, roll our eyes back into our skulls a la Linda Blair, and let out a noise that explains why that painted dog in the background looks so forlorn.

PEAK OF THE FREAKINESS
1:41, when Dixie begins to sound like an electric toothbrush. Or a female pleasure device.

TYPICAL YOUTUBE COMMENT
“How… did I get… here…?”
KitDeClaire

IS IT A WORKOUT YOU’D ACTUALLY DO?
Nah – although the Unworkout VHS tapes do receive a large number of five-star reviews on Amazon from older folks. Seems Dixie was an inspirational Mrs Carter long before Beyoncé hit the scene.