Generally speaking, when an animal attacks, you have one of four options:
- Try and make yourself big and scary
- Stay very still and hope they dismiss you as a particularly weird tree
- Run like your life depends on it – which given the animal involved, very well may be the case
- Flap around like an eight year old break dancing at a wedding, while shouting “OHMYGOD!OHMYGOD!OHMYGOD!” – although that only applies if you’re British, in a beer garden, and a wasp comes within five metres of you
Anyway. When it comes to bears, what do you do? Play dead or run?
Ordinarily, it depends on what kind of bear you’re facing. If it’s a Grizzly, you’re supposed to drop to the ground and play dead. If it’s a Black Bear, you should make yourself big and hope it thinks you’re not worth the hassle. If it’s a Brown Bear, force it to sit through all 73 hours of The Revenant and sneak away when it inevitably falls asleep.
However, sometimes your best course of action doesn’t depend on what kind of bear the person is facing, but what kind of person the bear is facing. Meet professional runner Moninda Marube. The Kenyan born athlete was out training in his adopted home of Auburn in Maine, USA, when all of a sudden he ran into two Black Bears.
“I don’t fear lions, but a bear is scary.”
Now, reports don’t state whether, at this point, Marube went the full Paula Radcliffe, but you’d forgive him for wanting to throw away his underpants afterwards. However, after initially trying to stare down the pair of enormous bears, his natural instincts kicked in, and Marube started doing what he does best; running.
Speaking to local press after the event, Marube said ““I had to think very fast. In my head, I know I can’t swim. I fear swimming. I fear water. I knew I could not climb up a tree because bears can climb a tree.” before adding “The only solution I had at that time was to be able to run.”
Sweet Lord, you love this man already don’t you. It’s alright. We all do.